Communication Styles

How do you know your communication styles? Are you an extrovert or introvert? What is your partner? Ask yourself these few questions (taken from Straight Talk for Active Adults workbook):

1. When I'm with people in group I feel: a) energized or b) like doing something more private.

2. At a party I enjoy: a) talking with many people or b) talking with a few friends.

3. When I wait in line I: a) talk with others, including strangers or b)stick to business.

4. I consider myself to be a: a) good talker or b) good listener.

5. People think of me as: a) hard to talk to or b) easy to talk to.

6. Talking with strangers: a) energizes me or b)takes my energy away.

7. I consider myself: a) an outgoing person or b) a private person.

8. I am the kind of person who is a) talkative or b) doesn't miss much.

9. I tend to: a) talk as I think or b) think for a while before I talk.

10. When a phone rings I am likely to: a) answer it quickly or b) wait and check the message later.

What were most of your answers? If most of your answers were a's then you most likely are an extrovert. If most of your answers were b's then you most likely are an introvert.

An extrovert, is usually a talkative person (speaker) who tends to talk aloud as they think. They are usually the last person to leave a party, since they usually like to hang out with people. They like introverts because introverts listen to them. They usually do not like silence or not knowing what an introvert is thinking. Extroverts can be tired, but recharged when they get to be around people.

An introvert, is usually a quiet person (listener) who may not let you know what they are thinking. They like quiet time and may not share their opinions often, even if they know the answer. Introverts may be ready to leave a party 5 minutes after they arrive. They enjoy extroverts because extroverts do most of the talking. Sometimes they think extroverts can be too self-focused and tire them out by talking too much.

Neither of these is wrong. They are both perfectly normal. Whether you are a talker, listener, neither, both, or somewhere in between, communication creates closeness, and will have a tremendous pay-off in your quality of life. Learn to talk more if you're an introvert. Learn to listen more if your an extrovert. Respect each other for your differences and appreciate one another for who you are.

Taken from Just the Facts: Straight Talk About Marriage/Relationships by Kelly Simpson